Sunday, May 21, 2006

he said, she said

2 years, 2 perspectives.

He said:
Though Pip and I celebrated our anniversary last weekend, I HAD to post a little more.

After I was done with my meeting today I took a trip to CSB and went to the Idzierda House, where Pip lived when we started dating I didn't need to go in, but just being present there gave me the opportunity to sit and think for a moment. Sometimes you need to retrace your steps to understand where you are standing.

I realized how fortunate I am to have Pip in my life. Someone so beautiful, so amazing, whose image stays with me though she is thousands of miles away. Whose energy is contagious, whose laugh is full of joy, whose eyes speak in terms of dreams, journeys and love. She completes me and strives me on to better things. In short, she makes me smile.

I say this because I recognize what we've been through-- our joy from when we started dating to when we were in Monaco, relaxing and enjoying just being around one another and sharing in each other's strengths. Being able to stand gazing at the Paris sky with the one you love, then looking at Pip, in whose eyes reflected the lights of the Eiffel Tower, is an image I will treasure my entire life. When I think of that image, all pain seems to go away-- and I am filled with a sense of peace and love.

What is particularly exciting is being able to continue our enjoyment of our Paris spring in three weeks, when Pip returns. We'll be able to dance in our backyard, much like we did in the Idzierda house one fall evening; Pip will stretch in our living room, like she used to in the Idzierda House; and I will see her smile as I leave a random note for her, much like she used to when I left to go home for the week ahead.

Even now, as I sit an ocean away in random pain from stones in my kidneys, I know that Pip worries about me, and wonders about how I am handling it all. That concern alone helps me to deal with it, as no pain seems bad when you can share it with someone else, and her willingness to absorb it, makes me eternally grateful, and know I found the right person to spend my life with.

So two years down, and a lifetime of love yet to go. In view of our memories, and Pip's return, the best seems yet to come. Thank you, dear, and much lovies!!!!

She said:

I have been meaning to say this for some time. There are people who you know love you and there are people who you know love you. And then there is my husband.

Being here has helped me to understand the human experience in a deeper, more tangible way. I have also understood my relationship in a more meaningful way. It is my hope that love is part of the greater human experience.

When I say love, I don’t want to just say that is gazing at each other admiringly. This kind of love seems to have so many more dimensions. This love is full of memories, laughter, embarrassments and an honesty that only this kind of love can bring.
History, Presence and Future.

This is the kind of love where after five years of being together you still find surprise notes taped to the steering wheel and yet when you left, I knew there would be a note hidden in my room. This is the kind of love where you stay up until 5 am trying to understand the other point of view. This is the kind of love where you frequently comment on the dog’s bowel movements without flinching. This is the kind of love where you push each other to achieve goals that both of you know wouldn’t be possible without the presence of your complement. This is the kind of love where you both know that when dinner is spoiled to walk towards the car. Taco Bell is only 6 blocks away. This is the kind of love where you understand laptops in bed. This is the kind of love where kidney stones, cramps and depression are talked about openly. This is the kind of love where I get called down to the basement to watch a football play that “I am probably not going to appreciate but is so amazing that you have to see it anyway.” This is the kind of love where you play trivia at Buffalo Wild Wings after going to the ballet. This is the kind of love where you watch him sleep because you know that he doesn’t get enough of it and it is too important. This is the kind of love where you play naked dance, dance revolution because it really is too hot. This is the kind of love where words don’t seem to be enough. Where hallmark doesn’t always do such a bad job of explaining what you can’t seem to say, Dave Matthews does better but cummings takes the cake. This love is the kind of love where you pick your naked wife out of a bathtub when she has a bleeding toe.

Today especially I was reminded of the day two years ago when we made our relationship holy. I don’t use the word holy lightly, or even in the way you might think I mean it. Holy means so much more. I am often struck by the greatest gift I have been given. Him. Of all the people in this universe, he picked me to share his existence. There is no greater gift. He picked me and I picked him. We serve each other. Nothing could be more holy than that.

I am reminded by these words sung at our wedding.

Will you let me be your servant
Let me be as Christ to you
Pray that I may have the grace
To let you be my servant, too

We are pilgrims on a journey
We are brothers on the road
We are here to help each other
Walk the mile and bear the load

I will hold the Christlight for you
In the night-time of your fear
I will hold my hand out to you
Speak the peace you long to hear

I will weep when you are weeping
When you laugh I'll laugh with you
I will share your joy and sorrow
Till we've seen this journey through


Love is not just gazing or kissing under the Eiffel Tower.
This kind of love is about service and journey.
This kind of love is amazing and holy.

I do hope that this love is the kind of love that is part of the greater human experience. I hope that this kind of love is for everyone.


lovies.

PS. We can’t dance in our backyard. We have a very large dog. Trust dear, it wouldn’t work out well.

4 comments:

Liz D. said...

Hi Dana and Eric! Tom and I have both been enjoying your blog over the last few months, and I have to say this anniversary post is amazing!! What a beautiful tribute to your relationship and to all of our relationships... isn't marriage a wonderfully interesting and rewarding thing?

it's so exciting that you're coming home this week! I hope your last few days of France and your MBA program are great, and that your huge transition back into the career world and Minnesota is smooth and full of joy. We will be excited to see you!

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